We ladies want the best for our partners on the dance floor. More confidence in him means more fun for us! Here are 5 ways we may be causing more harm than good.
- Reminding him what the teacher has told him in the past
- Pay attention to the things your teacher is asking him to think about, but don’t memorize them. It’s not up to you to remind him when your teacher is not around. It’s no fun for either of you if you’re a constant walking note card. Focus on responding to what he remembers on his own.
- Comparing him to other leaders
- This one definitely goes both ways (gentlemen, your article is coming). This is harmful for any dance development. Expecting a man to lead more like another man is impossible. He doesn’t follow men, therefore he has no idea what we are talking about when we say it’s more one way or another. He has nothing to compare it to, and you don’t want him focused on that anyway. You want him to focus on YOU! So focus on him. Not Matthew Magnificent who’s been dancing for 15 years.
- Helping the teacher communicate with them
- You may know your partner better than anyone else, but your instructor knows dancing, and even more importantly, they know teaching! Arthur Murray instructors are trained to cater to all types of learning styles so let them determine what works for your partner and what works for you! It’s their job and they love doing it!
- Turning him down for a dance
- Ladies! What are you doing!!? Do you have any idea what it takes to get them here!?!? Unless you are injured, say “yes” graciously. If you sincerely need a break, always promise the next dance!
- Waiting for him to learn to lead before you follow
- Sometimes it takes us a little more time to engage in our learning process in the beginning. Quite honestly, it’s very easy to slack off a bit when they have so much to take on. However, this is the most important time to pay attention! No one was born with a natural response mechanism to a man’s direction, especially in today’s world. That’s why you need to learn the cues he gives: to help you respond with ease. The quicker you do this, the quicker he believes it works and you can move on to that double hammerlock turn you’ve been dying to learn! Attentive follows make strong leaders!
Remember that for every woman waiting to be led better, there are 10 women who only dream of their husbands or boyfriends taking them to a dance lesson!